THCB Exclusive–Trump appoints Holt to run VA

Today Donald Trump pulled a big surprise. He changed the much criticized appointment for his new VA head from over-effusive physician Rear Adm. Ronny Jackson to well known lefty health blogger Matthew Holt. When asked why he wanted Holt to run the VA Trump said, “Look, I’m pretty smart and I’ve appointed now only the best people like John Bolton and Mike Pompeo to run our foreign policy. If I appoint someone else I like, how can I fire him quickly? That Holt guy seems to hate me, and he’s never stayed in one of my hotels, so he’s perfect for the VA–I hear that the accommodation is a bit rough, not exactly a ten.”

When THCB asked Holt why he agreed to take the job running the VA, he suggested that it had a lot to do with his English roots. “As most of my followers know I grew up in England and like the concept of everyone suffering together in a government funded and provided socialized National Health System. The VA and its fellow traveler the DOD is the only health system like that in America and it’s a brilliant place to start”. When asked about his likely future polices for the VA, Holt suggested that massive expansion was the key initiative. In a written statement, his VA spokesman noted “Given the utter lunacy of the Trump Administration and the crazy warmongers now running the show, the chances of total war versus North Korea and Iran are very high. So essentially everyone in the country will soon be called up to the military, which means that soon eventually everyone will be a Veteran. And if Trump loses in 2020, by 2021 we’ll be at war with the Russians so either way my theory pays off.”

Holt was on the Charlie Rose show last week when he told Rose about his philosophy for the future. “When everyone in the country is part of the VA, we can shut down that ineffective and expensive private health system, and instead everyone can get their care the way I think is best. And if they don’t like it Rasu Shrestha will send them their records using the Lighthouse Blue Button Carrier Pigeon system, and we’ll give them a row boat to head to Nepal or somewhere.

When TCHB reached him for comment, Cato health spokesman Michael Cannon said, “if you are going to expand this universal health care stuff, you might as well give it a real go. Lucky for me, I have bone spurs…”

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6 replies »

  1. The Brits health spending for their National Health Service was 9.7% of their GDP versus 17.8% in the USA during 2016. Their health spending benefits from the higher level of Social Capital in Great Britain as a means to mitigate the adversities that plague our citizens at a much higher level. Veterans care is an integral part of the NHS so there is no VA system to soak up so much overhead.

  2. Well played. I would have just assumed he wanted a Brit because you guys are the world experts on dealing with queues, so the perfect person to deal with the waits they are worrying about.


  3. The VA folks are fairly hide-bound by their long enduring traditions, best characterized by the quaint aphorism: “The job isn’t done until the paper-work if finished.” His best focus would be to energize a ‘human capital’ focused, professional development renewal process as a means to energize the institutional malaise of the VA, Top down. The loss of management control for the Denver VA Hospital project is a good example of its current status.

    The VA’s central purpose of “rehab for disabled veterans” needs to receive a renewed energy. Concurrently, the VA will also need a clearly defined and implemented means to support a variety of models for the Primary Healthcare offered to the remaining veteran obligations. Implementing Primary Healthcare within a Complex Healthcare administrative environment doesn’t work and never will.
    The VA has recently abandoned its in-house, long-enduring EMR for a Cerner iteration. I wonder how that will be skewed by the Parkinson’s Law dominating the health spending of our nation’s various healthcare sectors.

    Best wishes to Emperor Holt !

  4. And a happy, fun-filled April Fools Day to you, too!
    This is super!
    As for that VA appointment, this comment will be hard to top:
    => Former President Obama’s deputy chief of staff Jim Messina on Friday compared this week’s announcement of the White House physician getting tapped as the new secretary of Veterans Affairs to “having your Uber driver park the space shuttle” during an interview on MSNBC.