From the always good but sometimes brilliant The Borowitz Report. This one finally explains the point of Medicare Part D.
U.S. CONFUSES INSURGENTS WITH PRESCRIPTION DRUG PLANMilitary Launches ‘Operation Incomprehensible Program’ Across IraqIn an effort to confuse Iraqi insurgents, the Pentagon announced today that the U.S. had begun bombarding insurgent positions with copies of President Bush’s Medicare prescription drug plan.At a press briefing at the Pentagon, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said that the idea of confusing the insurgents with the President’s Medicare plan was hatched last week, after Mr. Bush appeared at a series of town hall meetings at which seniors in his audience seemed thoroughly bewildered by the intricate new program.“We realized, if this prescription drug plan is that confusing in English, imagine how incoherent it would seem once it was translated into Arabic,” Secretary Rumsfeld said.As soon as Pentagon planners seized upon the idea of using the
President’s plan to confuse the insurgents, Operation Incomprehensible
Program was launched.
According to Secretary Rumsfeld, U.S. warplanes pounded insurgent
positions in the citiers of Tikrit and Najaf with copies of the
prescription drug plan in the early morning hours of Monday.
Mr. Rumsfeld said that satellite photos of those positions have
been encouraging thus far, showing dozens of Iraqi insurgents reading
the prescription drug plan and scratching their heads.
The Defense Secretary said he was hopeful that Operation
Incomprehensible Program would leave the Iraqi insurgents totally
baffled, but he hinted that the Pentagon had other tactics up its
sleeve: “We are fully prepared to bombard them with copies of my press